If You Want a Calm Life, You Need to Practice This 1 Thing
A life lesson from a guy who hiked every national park
Good morning, everyone, and Merry Christmas!
I’m visiting Petrified Forest National Park in a few days with my girlfriend, Dani. I couldn’t be more excited.
I’m reminded of an article I wrote last year about the significance of those grounds. It’s undoubtedly an ecological wonder of the world, but I’ve always been fascinated by the park’s complicated relationship with people. It says a lot about the human condition. Read the article for more!
I read a lot this past year.
A story about a 30-year-old journalist named Conor Knighton, who visited every national park in America… All in one year.
Every. Single. One.
From Acadia to Yosemite. From the deepest dwellings of Mammoth Cave to the peaks of Denali.
The adventure started as a small assignment — a report on the “Big 3” parks (Yellowstone, Yosemite, and Grand Canyon).
He ended up doing all of them, basically alone.
But I’m burying the lede.
Months before he came up with the idea of exploring our parks, Conor’s fiancé dumped him after a five-year relationship.
She left without explanation right before they planned to mail the save-the-date cards.
Actually, it was worse than that.
She left him for a coworker who she ended up getting engaged to 4 months later.
Record scratch.
So…. if you feel like resentment is holding you back. This one is for you.
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Resentment is a short-term boost but a long-term poison
I carried a lot of resentment this past year.
I learned that anger is a double-edged sword.
On one end, your focus, tactics, and energy skyrocket. You’ll do anything to prove to the world that you’re good enough.
But your “why” gets so out of whack that you end up bubbling even more resentment.
I accomplished so much in 2022. But all the wins, the goals I hit, the cool things I did, all they did was remind me of the time I was made to feel like a loser.
That’s a curious tradeoff for more focus and energy.
Where’s the fun in that?
The 1 thing you have to practice for a calm existence?
Take a lesson from Conor. You have to let go.
Let go of the anger, the doubt, the rumination. The regret.
And forgive.
Why?
Because we’re human. People make mistakes and end up hurting others. It happens.
It’s the human condition to feel that pain for a while, but it’s also our responsibility to forgive.
Life’s too short, and there’s work to be done.
I found my peace reading Conor’s story. Conor found his peace after visiting Petrified Forest National Park in Arizona.
A flood devastated the landscape hundreds of millions of years ago and buried a forest in water and volcanic chemicals.
The prehistoric trees resurfaced millions of years later and left a beautiful, “petrified” reflection of the Triassic world within the rocks.
As you can imagine, people steal the petrified fossils. It’s a big problem.
In fact, it’s been a problem since the park’s founding, and despite over a hundred years of park rangers attempting to reduce theft, it keeps happening.
Not cool.
What’s more interesting, though, is the remorse people show after the deed.
There’s a room at the ranger’s office with thousands and thousands of letters dating back to 1938 written by hikers and tourists who snuck a few rocks into their backpacks.
“This letter is to apologize to you for taking some pieces of rock from the forest. I am very sorry. I am also sorry that I told a lie to the man at the gate who asked me if I had removed anything from the park.”
One letter simply writes:
“Dear earth, forgive me.” With a small baggie of rocks attached to the letter.
The point is, everyone makes mistakes.
We get caught up in waves of experience, emotions, and passions. Sometimes we get crushed by someone else’s hurricane — even when you don’t deserve it.
As Jesus said, “forgive them, they know not what they do.”
Conor’s reports earned a weekly spot on CBS Morning Edition and became one of the show’s most popular segments.
He went on to win an Emmy and a book deal. The book, “Leave Only Footprints,” would become a national bestseller.
Life gets better when you forgive
The one thing I noticed about Conor is that his traumatic event never consumed him.
In his book, he wishes the breakup never happened to him, but then he drops the story and talks about our beautiful country and how to save it.
For me, it was a reminder that you can, in fact, drop the old story.
You don’t have to assume the worst in people.
You don’t have to let every slight rattle you.
You can let go.
You can forgive.
I love this. It is everything I believe.I recently read Margaret Renkl's A Comfort of Crows.In the book she talks about the redemptive power of nature.She relates the experience we all have of growing a family for many years and then they are gone into the world. You experience a kind of homesickness.At that point she states we must go out into nature and expand our definition of home.